Now, where was I? Oh yeah...

The Aussies creamed us and ran away with all of New Zealand's Rugby World Cup hopes. The better team won on the day.

Their really odd shaped balls are to blame, I feel.

~~ Is three-in-a-bed sex fucking odd? ~~

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Now, where was I? Oh yeah...

Baby Tiggers are born with all of their stripes
It helps the wee Tiggers to grow up just right
Pristine striations for everyone to see
That each one can be all that a Tigger can be

Eeyores are glum from the time they are born
Eternally gloomy and filled up with mourn
Drabbily gray like an elephant's hide
Yes soft enough and big enough for a Piglet to ride

Kangas are jolly and loving and safe
And caring's no problem, a commitment won't chafe
Fulfilled in her role of caring for Roo
There's nothing else on earth that she would rather do

Owls have a wisdom that none can deny
You don't see them laugh and you don't see them cry
They pontifficate and opine from high in a tree
While Rabbits plant veges to eat for their tea

Pooh Bears, oh Pooh Bears, what more can one say
But that someone has stolen their brain cells away
Even easier than parting a fool and his money
Is parting a Pooh Bear from his big jar of hunny

Maybe if Tigger-stripes were changed into spots
And gloomy old Eeeyore's had a smile on their chops
If Owls could talk sense into slow-witted Poohs
Then perhaps Life would be fairer, not so damned hard to chew.

I have no idea why I wrote that... shit I must be bored, or tired... or something.

~~ Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional ~~

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Now, where was I? Oh yeah...



Colours mean stuff. Everyone associates some colour with some feeling or memory or object or person. Colours can have a broader cultural meaning or a closer, more intimate and personal meaning. And their definition is completely subjective. People generally attribute emotions to colours - green with envy, blue when depressed, red with rage; pink is for girls and blue is for boys and black is for mourning and white is for purity.

And the sky is blue, too.

Or is it...?

We all know that people use the word "Blue" as a general colour reference because there are lots of members of the Blue family. But their existence depends solely on our own interpretation of how our own brain "saw" the colour and stored it in memory as a unique member of the Blue family.

So, what happens if the colour your brain "saw" and stored was actually the same as someone else's green? How do you know it's really blue anyway... cos someone told you it was?

That would have really fucked up Louis Armstrong's anthem, wouldn't it...

"I see skies of chartreuse and clouds of aubergine"... just doesn't have the same ring to it, does it...?

Shari has been breaking things. Things in my kitchen. So far, the score is 1 x coffee mug, 1 x drinking glass (stolen from the pub many years ago) and 1 x white plastic chinaman's hat lamp shade thingy (common or garden variety).

She feels very bad when she breaks something and has insisted on replacing each and every one of these items with a new version. Hence a bigger and better coffee mug, a taller and prettier drinking glass, and a larger and definitely very much redder chinaman's hat lamp shade thingy (definitely NOT common OR garden). She brought the new lamp shade over last night and installed it in it's new home. Then we all went to the Matrix. When we came home, the light was on and casting an exciting (yet strangely nauseating) "whorehouse red" tinge to the entire kitchen. Mr Sez asked me what I thought of it. I said I honestly wasn't quite sure what to think of it, yet. He said it was excellent advertising.

I'm waiting for her to break the TV... I would really like a big, new widescreen TV. I wish she would hurry up.

**AFTERTHOUGHT**

Just as I was finishing this, Shari emailed me to say, and I quote..."Fuck hope I dont break the dunny!"

I don't think I'll let her use our toilet any more, just in case.

~~ Whenever I feel blue, I start breathing again. ~~

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Now, where was I? Oh yeah...

10 DOG PEEVES ABOUT HUMANS

1. Blaming your farts on me... not funny... not very funny at all!
2. Yelling at me for barking... I'M A FRIGGIN' DOG YOU IDIOT!
3. Taking me for a walk, then not letting me check stuff out. Exactly whose walk is this anyway?
4. Any trick that involves balancing food on my nose... stop it!
5. Any haircut that involves bows or ribbons. Now you know why we chew your stuff up when you're not home.
6. The sleight of hand, fake fetch throw. You fooled a dog! What a proud moment for the top of the food chain, you nitwit.
7. Taking me to the vet for "the big snip", then acting surprised when I freak out every time we go back
8. Getting upset when I sniff the crotches of your guests. Sorry, but I haven't quite mastered that handshake thing yet.
9. How you act disgusted when I lick myself. Look, we both know the truth, you're just jealous.
10. Dog sweaters. Have you noticed the fur? Imbecile!

~~ Never judge a dog's pedigree by the kind of books he does not chew. ~~

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Now, where was I? Oh yeah...

Tomorrow I'm going to the Matrix with Shari and Mr Sez.

Oh, luscious Keanu Reeves in his long black coat... and the leather.... with all those big, manly weapons... ***swoon***

I am such a leather slut, even more than I am a suit slut.

Mind you, his butt looked pretty damn fine out of the leather pants in the last instalment. Shari and I have been trying for weeks to steal the big promotional Matrix - Reloaded cutout thingy with Neo and Morpheus on it from the video shop, but Damien the Omen-Boy keeps catching us at it and says "do it on someone else's shift, will ya?" It isn't easy you know, trying to flog a 6' high rigid cardboard cutout thingy. I mean, shit, we deserve points just for trying so many times, not to mention our truly exquisite taste in wanting to in the first place.

I dunno, no sense of adventure, that man. Considering he works right next door to the Massage Parlour and the Naughty Knickers shop with all its glorious paraphernalia on display in the window, you'd think he would :-)

Just wait until I start writing about the musical condoms you can buy... coming soon to a blog near you.

But while you are waiting, you can check out what your name really means HERE. Mine means "Raven haired Moon Goddess of more than ample prowess in all the important womanly arts; exciting, raunchy and the ultimate sexual playmate"

Or was that "Raving lunatic that blows goats...".

I'll get back to you on that.

~~ Traditional condom packet warning: "My Dad says these things don't work" ~~

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Now, where was I? Oh yeah...

The All Blacks beat the crap out of the Sth Africans at the Rugby World Cup. Ground them into the dust, even.

Come on Australia - it's your turn soon :-P

~~ Rugby is a game played by men with odd-shaped balls ~~

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